How to tame a Human
by Ichi-ichi-paradise
Summary: Here's the long awaited not quite sequel to 'How to break an Elf' that you've all waited for. It's Lee and Haldir..enjoy.


A/N.

So it took me approx. Forever to write this...but it just kept eluding me...CURSE YOU STORY GODS!!

Eek, we have a massive thunderstorm and I'm hoping to get this finished before the power goes out...if it goes out at all...:knock on wood:

I don't own Lord of the Rings...or Haldir. He wishes I did though. -pervy grin-

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Leeana Ryan was an odd creature in Middle Earth. She had the build of an Elf, the looks of a Fey, the height of a tall Mountain Dwarf and the hips of a Human. All in all it should have been an odd combination, not in the least bit enticing from the sounds of it, but for her it worked.

Large slanted eyes the color of moss when the sun hits it just right, almost glowing. Her nose was human enough, not quite as large as a Dwarfs, not as perky as a Faerie, and not as slender as an Elf's. Her lips weren't overly large, nor were they small, a bit on the thin side but they fit the face perfectly.

Her hair was a corkscrew of fire, bright red with hints of a darker color and even some copper spiraling through it. Curls tumbled halfway down her back, giving her the image of a mischievous fire nymph, that was on a good day.

She was short, shorter then the average human. When she'd first met Gimli he'd stuttered to see a human the same height as him, stuttered then blushed a bright red. It had amused Lee and she'd spent the entire rest of the time the Dwarves had been visiting embarrassing the dwarf.

She was slender, her limbs nearly as slim as an elves, it had been a huge shock to Haldir when they'd first met and he'd taken her as a young halfling. It was her hips that had told him otherwise, they stood out from her body, shapely and taunting him. And when he'd finally gotten over his ridiculous hatred of humans and bedded her he'd realized that those hips had been made for his hands.

His favorite part of Lee by far was her skin, sun kissed and smooth it stood out in stark relief in the midst of all the pale skinned elves. Though at the moment her skin was dewed with sweat and flushed from sex.

"Is the human tired?" Haldir's voice mocked as he stood in front of the kneeling woman on the bed. Her hair was braided back, a few whisps escaping and falling to frame her face, making her look like a captured flame goddess.

"I can take anything you can dish out...elf-tard." Lee countered, flipping her head to the side to get a piece of hair out of her eyes. Haldir glared at the comment, though he wasn't quite sure what it meant he knew an insult when he heard one.

"What have I told you about calling me that?" He growled, striding across the room to grab the riding crop he'd brought in from the stables.

"Not to do it?" Lee's grin was a direct challenge to the elf and his knuckles tightened on the handle of the crop. His Human was tied tightly, her wrists above her head, the leather rope wrapped around one of the roof beams. She was on her knees, the rope giving her just enough slack so that she wasn't in any pain of dislocating her shoulders.

"Turn around."

"Think I'm an idiot? How about we tie you up and I give you a few wacks with the crop?"

"I said turn around."

"Blow me." Haldir glared, his normally cold blue eyes turning glacial as he approached the bed where sharp green eyes watched his every move. In a move too swift to be seen by Human eyes Lee's arms had been freed from the ceiling restraints and after a brief but vicious struggle she had been tied face down to the head board.

Taking a deep breath Lee bit down on a the pillow directly underneath her. Oh he'd love it if she were to make a sound, it would be like a complete surrender to the mighty March Warden, like that would ever happen. The first stroke made her tense up, it was a teasing bite that stung only a little and Lee knew what he was after.

The crop made a short trip down her back, skipping her buttocks completely as a sharp snap on her upper thighs made the woman jump. She bit back a moan, but damn that had hurt, and the bastard knew her thighs were sensitive. Trust an elf-tard to use that against you in a more violent form of foreplay.

Hands, callused and hardened from centuries of weapons use gripped the back of her knees and spread her legs, the tip of the crop dancing teasingly across her inner thighs, completely ignoring her center.

Lee's breath hitched as the crop followed the seam of her thigh to her lower back, it carressed her skin softly as if in an apology for the bright red marks that now burned across her golden flesh.

"You're alright?" There was a certain amount of caring in that dark chocolate sarcastic voice that she loved so much. You'd have to listen for it of course, and if you didn't know him almost as well as you knew yourself it would come across as sarcasm.

"Did I use my safe words?" Lee bit back, arching her spine and wiggling her hips in an effort to entice her elven lover. From the silence behind her and the fact that she could feel his stare she figured her efforts were working.

"I love your body."

"I'm pretty fond of it myself." Lee snickered, she slid a knee under her stomach and tried to flip her self over but Haldir was having known of that. A strong slender hand wrapped around her right ankle and pulled, sending Lee sprawling back on the mattress face first.

"Bastard. Let me up." His hands were working across her lower back and she shivered, not so much from sensation as she was ticklish. Her muscles sensitive to the slightest pressure. Haldir had once attempted to give her a foot rub and she'd nearly kicked him in the face, only good reflexes had saved him from a possible broken nose.

Haldir smirked as he ran his hands up Lee's spine, then back down, letting them rest on the impressive swell of her ass. Elves didn't have bottoms like this, there were all slim and slender, not a hint of curves anywhere unless it was around the chest area, allot of Elliths were generously endowed, something the Human males seemed fond of for reasons that escaped him. He far preferred curves lower down, gave him something to hold on to when your intended was trying to squirm away, as was the case now.

"Why are you so addictive?"

"Fuck if I know, now let me up."

"You love it when I take you from behind, it makes you feel alive, makes you feel like an animal." Lips nibbled on her shoulder and Lee could feel her resolve slipping away as her bones slowly melted and her brain dribbled out her ears. Haldir rarely talked dirty, but it was a huge turn on when he did. The march Warden believed in protocol, and protocol rarely called for being lewd.

"Then fucking do it and stop talking me to death." Strong hands lifted her hips so her knees slid underneath her, baring herself to the world.

"You look hot." Lee snorted at how human he sounded, apparently her speech patterns were finally starting to wear off on him. She turned her head as far as her neck would let her and batted her eyes at him, trying without success to keep the evil grin off her face. Her head flew back into the pillow as slender elf fingers slid into her, pumping without rhythm and driving her slowly insane.

"Yeeeeesssss." Arching her hips she tried her best to impale herself on the pale digits, hating her elf at the moment when his hand clutched at her hip and kept her from moving.

"Behave." All at once both hands were gone from her body and her head was snapped back, Haldir wrapping her fiery braid around his pale hand, the fingers that had been inside her pushed into her mouth even as he pushed into her. "Taste." It wasn't so much as a comment as a command and Lee glared even as she sucked her essence off his fingers. It was slightly bitter, somewhat like lemon juice crossed with a nearly ripe mango; Sour with a hint of pine.

Haldir pumped into Lee's tight heat, his hand leaving her mouth to wrap around her hip, his left hand still holding her braid tightly. He grinned maniacally, enjoying the way her hair felt like reigns. Of course if he ever told Lee that she'd kick him out of his bed and never let him back into it until he'd made her jealous with one of the twins or multiple Elliths.

She was moaning, sucking rhymthically on his fingers and Haldir thought this might be what heaven felt like. Hot, wet, heat surrounding him, a willing female under him, it was everything he could ever ask for. And though both of them knew that he was Lee's whole life and she was but a chapter in his, they had put it out of their minds, deciding to take that road when it was time and not a moment further.

Lee's body tightened suddenly and Haldir raised an eyebrow, she usually never came this fast and he slowed to barely a crawl, though it was enough for the Human writhing under him to climax. The slow rubbing of flesh on flesh had her nerve endings sparking, sending waves of release to her brain. Haldir threw his head back, his flaxen hair sliding down his back as Lee's inner muscles massaged him. He'd be damned if he let himself come after just one orgasm on her half.

Sex with a human was so much different then sex with one of his own kind. Female elves didn't have the same kind of inner muscles that humans did, it's one of the things that made child birth so much more painful. So when human women came all those muscles massaged and caressed in a flurry of motion that made it nearly impossible to stay sane, even after being with one for nearly two years.

Growling Haldir pulled his fingers from Lee's mouth and let her braid fall from his clutching fingers. He wrapped his hands around her hips with such force she knew she would have bruises tomorrow, and she didn't bruise. Haldir loved her hips, the way they fit into his palms perfectly, the way they curved, that little ridge just where his fingers ended that gave him the leverage to hang on.

Stopping to think Haldir leaned forward, the movement pressing him into Lee causing her to squeal lightly as he undid the knot and freeing her hands. Slipping a strong arm under her stomach he lifted her into the air and moved to sit back on his heels. Letting gravity take effect he allowed Lee to slide down on his length by herself. His hand going back to her hips and lifting her up, then pulling her back down. The process was repeated until Lee felt her self nearing climax again, she came with barely a whimper, her toes curling at the sensations coursing through the limbs, weighing them down and making her sluggish.

Haldir pulled out, moving off the bed to stand beside it and flipping Lee over to watch her face as he gripped her hips and slid her back onto his shaft, sheathing himself in one quick movement. Her inner muscles were still tight from her recent climax and Haldir nearly winced, the movement being nearly painful. Lee moved a hand up, biting one of her knuckles until it nearly bled.

"Don't bite yourself you little idiot." Haldir's smooth voice slid through Lee's system as he grabbed her hand, never stopping his deep thrusts. His fingers threaded through hers and he used his free hand to brace himself, his left hand moving to grab one of Lee's legs and hitch it up onto his hip. Her leg curled around his waist and the new position gave him a whole new range of movement while reducing Lee to a pile of mush. It took a few more position changes before she came again and Haldir had already decided to end off the night with a bang. He let Lee rest for a few moments as he piled pillows on top of each other before grabbing the human and flipping her onto the pillows so she lay face down in a mimic of her first position tied to the bed frame.

Taking hold of her hips he nearly sighed at how right it felt to slide forward into that delicious heat. With her pelvis tilted upwards thanks to the pillows it took only a few experimental thrusts to have Lee choking back a scream. Elves didn't have g-spots either, Haldir thought to himself with a particularly evil smirk. It was the smirk his men knew and feared, it was the one that told them he was going to work them hard until they were jelly. His hips positioned faster and faster, the tip of his penis brushing over Lee's G-spot and hitting it directly alternately with no set rhythm until she was begging incoherently. She could never quite catch her breath, and when she finally came it was a hoarse scream that took what little oxygen she had left. Dark spots danced in front of her vision and she hazily felt Haldir tense up behind her, he came with a shout of his own and the feeling of semen filling her had her coming again. And then she was gone, her body going limp as Haldir began to slow his panting.

He gave a lazy grin as he pulled out of his human, feeling somewhat proud that he'd made her actually loose conciousness. That was complete bragging rights to anyone who would listen. Pulling out he shuddered at Lee's inner muscles that tried to pull him back in. Picking up his human he began to make his way to the bathroom, she'd complain if she woke sticky and sore, that he knew from experience. Beside's the March Warden thought with a smirk, maybe he'd be able to coerce her into a little clean fun.

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Ha, that was fun to write. I guess my smut isn't broken like I originally thought it was. Xp


End file.
